"A Levels Story"
By John Pirillo
Moose. "Anyone like an Oreo?"
So begins the continuation of our story about four nerdy heroes from the TransDimensional Academy of Physics. Last we heard from them they had been sabotaged as they reconstructed an ancient buried pyramid that had ET technology built into it by terrorist group intent on keeping them from discovering its secrets.
The pyramid launched into TransDimensional space and the four boys barely made it into their cocoons to weather the sudden launch. When the launch ended, the boys were still recovering from the trauma of the flight and the sudden change of vibrations they were experiencing and only one of them had enough sense to be practical at that moment. Or at least as practical as anyone can be who is pretty much a one pointed eating machine.
"Anyone like an Oreo?" Moose asked again in the darkness.
He had secreted a package into his cocoon for emergencies such as this, although maybe not quite so extreme as this one appeared to be.
He pressed his way out of the cocoon that enclosed him and set his feet on the stone slab flooring. "Guys?"
Just a low, deep thrumming sound from beneath the stone. The engines.
"Oh I am so low." Dexter moaned, his high pitched voice illuminating the darkness at that moment.
"You're nuts, man."
"Only three left."
Moose handed one to his left and a hand grabbed it.
"Thanks." Greg said, stuffing his mouth.
"Hey!" Dexter shrieked.
Dexter scrambled from his cocoon, banging his head on its lid as he emerged. He flicked on a pocket mag light, saw the cookies and reached for one.
Knobs, dove from the left and took one.
"Guys! I'm a starving man, off a long voyage out to space."
Knobs stuffed his mouth. "Mummph. Makes four of us."
Dexter sighed as Moose hefted the last one, eyeing it hungrily.
"Oh, I'm going to hate myself in the morning." He looked around. "If there's morning wherever we are."
He launched the cookie to Dexter, who caught it and shoved it into his mouth. "Tanks, you're a million, bro!"
"Levels won't get you anything, dude." Moose muttered, looking unhappily at his empty Oreos bag.
"So where are we then?" Dexter asked, climbing out of his cocoon and stomping towards the viewport, which was black at that moment. He slammed a palm down on a glowing red panel and the viewport lit up.
"Oh my God!" Moose cried out, rushing forward to see well.
Greg and Knobs stumbled behind him, putting their arms around Dexter and Moose to see better, and stabilize their wobbly legs.
"Looks like some kind of big dipper." Moose said.
Outside the pyramid was this gigantic dipper shaped object with a lake sized liquid of some kind filling its base. The water had a slightly amethyst cast to it. The skies above were a gentle turquoise.
"Three suns!" Greg said in awe.
"No." Moose said. "Four."
They squeezed closer. Four suns there were. All four in different parts of the sky, all of different sizes.
"It must be hot outside." Greg, ever the practical one said.
"Well, it's ain't going to get cooler in here, if we don't repair those engines. We're lucky the Atlanteans built them so well, or we'd all be a rosebud in someone's eye right now."
"You mean in that stupid trader's eye. How could he?" Knods moaned. "Just because we forgot some cash."
"Hey!" Moose snorted. "I didn't forget it all. I paid him all our loan money."
Greg spun around and grabbed Moose by his shirt collar. "You big monkey, do you realize what you've done?"
"No. Should I?"
Greg let loose and walked away. "I'm surrounded by idiots."
"Then if we're idiots, what does that make you for flying with us?" Moose pointed out with a nasty grin on his face.
"A bigger idiot."
He burst into laughter and the others rushed forward and began pounding his back and each other's.
"We did it!" Moose snorted.
Dexter. "The stars are ours!"
"Space the final frontier!" Greg mimicked William Shatner.
"I wonder if we can franchise this place?" Knods asked himself.
"What a great idea?" Moose said. "Come buy your Milky Way cones and fries at the Big Dipper, the largest ice cream factory in the universe."
"Aren't you forgetting something?" Dexter asked in an annoyed voice.
Greg and Dexter both pointed to the base of the pyramid.
Moose leaned forward to look. "Oh." Was his only word.
Below at the base were these creatures that looked like something out of a Sponge Bob movie with antenna, gills and fins.
"Think they're from the dipper, Moose?" Dexter asked.
"If they are, then there goes our franchise."
Moose smacked his lips. "I wonder if they would taste..."
Knods puts a hand over Moose's mouth."Don't go there."
Everyone claps a hand over his mouth. "Not there!" They exclaim.
Moose breaks free. "It's not like I'm going to eat them raw like Sushi."
"Oh, he did it!" Greg groans.
Outside, the creatures suddenly rush away and dive into the Big Dipper Lake.
"They read minds!" Moose exclaims.
"Yeah. Mister Eat Em All Up is finally getting some cogs moving in that clunker of a brain of his."
"Hey! No need to insult my gears. They're as good as anybody's here."
Dexter laughs. "Well, that settles it. We're all idiots."
Everyone breaks into laughter.
"Moose, check the engines, while we check for any other sabotage."
"Got it." Moose answered, licking the Oreo bag for any crumbs.
Everyone stares at him.
He glares at them. "It's better than nothing!"
Moose storms out.
Dexter and Greg exchange glances.
Knods. "If those whatever they are out there can read minds, then..."
"They also know we're stranded." Dexter answered for him.
"Can't be a good thing." Greg agreed.
"Is it ever?" Knods sighed.
"All right, everyone, to work. Our lives may depend on it."
Everyone scattered throughout the chambers of the pyramid, tracing the cables and links that ran the gigantic pyramid through Trans dimensional space.
"Got it!" Moose's voice of triumph echoed throughout the ship.
Everyone came running, one at a time, squeezing into the engine room.
Moose held up a caftan. It was smeared with a brown liquid.
"What do you call a squished Arab terrorist?"
"Moose, have some respect!" Dexter begged.
Moose looked at the caftan, and then shrugged. "It could have been one of us too."
They all immediately crossed themselves, and then burst into laughter.
"Nah!" They exclaimed.
Then the engines began to crank up on their own.
"Moose!" Dexter warned.
Moose holds up his sweaty palms. "I didn't do it."
"Well, if you didn't, then who..."
"Oh God!" Greg yelled, and then ran back the way he had just come.
The others followed as best they could, the tunnel being so small and squishy they sometimes had to crawl on their hands and knees.
"I wonder if Atlanteans were pygmies." Moose groans as he barely squeezes through an opening, then dashes after the rest.
They reach the control room, just as the cocoons begin to shut.
"Inside!" Dexter orders.
"We're all gonna die if we don't!"
"How do you know we're not going to anyway?"
Greg tossed a quarter. "Heads. We win. Get in there!"
They all dive into their cocoons. Not a second too soon as the bubbles close them in and the giant pyramid trembles violently and its engines kick in full force.
Outside, the natives from the Big Dipper, are approaching the ship as it launches.
They all cheer as it vanishes into TransDimensional space.
The taller of the creatures watching the pyramid vanish, turns to his companion on the right and quips "I wonder what they taste like?"
All the creatures gathered there burst into laughter. They had heard the thoughts of Moose.